How To Make Decision With More Ease
I had to make a lot of decisions recently, maybe you too.
A part of me dreads making decision, especially when there’re endless options.
FOMO, fear of making a mistake, regretting.
Having many options can be a blessing or a curse.
For a long time, I made my decisions based on fear or conditioning.
For years, I've tried to fit into a mold that wasn't made for me.
To take a Master in Business Administration.
To take a first job in a prestigious consulting firm.
Those choices have been sources of suffering and frustration.
I was living a life I hadn’t chosen with the heart but with the head.
When I made the decision to leave everything and go to India to get certified as a yoga teacher, I knew it was the right decision.
Despite the fears and uncertainties, my whole being was telling me "go for it".
Not just my head, but my body, my heart, my belly.
I was never a fan of making tables with pro and cons in order to help me make decisions, it was more energy-sucking and confusing than helpful.
In order to help you make decisions more easily, big or small, I've put together 5 tips.
1. Allow yourself some silence
Take a break from your busy schedule to refocus.
Listen to yourself.
Meditation can do wonders.
Let dormant ideas/ thoughts/ emotions naturally emerge and observe them.
Whenever I feel doubtful, stuck, confuse, I often get my sparks of answers or ideas I haven't even thought about when I meditate.
2. Trust yourself and stop asking for other people's opinions
In the past, when I couldn't make a decision, I'd ask everyone around me.
Sometimes I already knew the answer, but I'd still ask, wanting someone to validate my choice, not taking full responsibility.
As a result, the more I relied on others, the less I trusted myself to make decisions for myself.
Making decisions aligned with our true self is the opposite approach: It's about reconnecting with ourselves and listen to what our body / heart / soul have to say.
The more we get into the habit of doing this, the more we strengthen our self-confidence to make decisions that are serving us.
The more we externalize our ability to decide, the less we're in touch with our intuition.
3. Don't let fear guide your choices
We often make decisions based on fears.
Fear of leaving this job that's not fulfilling.
Scared to take this new job because we think we are not up to it.
Staying in a toxic relationship for fear of being alone.
We often prefer to choose the least risk.
But decisions based on fear most often don't serve our highest self and prevent us from living our full potential and our dreams.
4. Stop operating only from your head, use your body intelligence
As I said, I used the technique of table, listing the "pros" and "cons" when I had to take important decision.
However this was rarely helping me see more clearly.
What is more helpful in general is to connect with my emotional landscape, which requires to drop into my body.
I always ask myself : How do you want to feel ?
My emotions are my compass to make decisions, big or small:
How to dress today, what types of people to surround myself with, where to live, what professional direction to take.
What I want most those days is to feel anchored, stable and belonging : this will be my compass to decide where to go next, which place to chose to live in.
5. Ask yourself what are your deepest desires and which choices will support them ?
This requires knowing what you want in the long term.
Some decisions do not serve us immediately but may be necessary to create our long-term vision.
For example, I chose to take this part-time job which I don't like, but which will help me save money or allow me to start, in parallel, a personal project.
Often we think we are making conscious and free choices but often these choices are made according to our conditioning.
We're so used to pleasing others and avoid conflict, that we make decisions that go along with others, to be "accepted" and that we don't even know what we truly want.
This go back to tip#1 and #2 : tune-inward to find your own truth and trust yourself.
I hope all this was helpful.
Let me know about your own experience, what you resonate with most !